2 Secret Techniques, How To Save My Marriage

If you’re wondering, “How to save my marriage?” then you only have to look around you to remember the things you did together when you were first married or first dating. Are you still doing those things today? If you’re trying to figure out, “How to save my marriage?” then chances are you’re not.

Marriages get into trouble for a variety of different reasons. There are affairs, lies, boredom, changes people go through that make them more or less appealing to each other, moves, children, jobs . . . . All these things factor into a marriage and help determine whether it’s healthy or whether you’ll end up asking, “How to save my marriage?”

If there are have been affairs or serious betrayals and lies, then probably the best thing you can do if you want to save the marriage it to go to counseling. This isn’t one of the secret techniques, but it’s probably the only one that can really help once things like that have gone on.

Through marriage counseling, you may be able to get at the heart of why there was cheating, and find ways to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Counseling may also lead you to the painful decision that you don’t want to remain in such a marriage where you may not be able to trust your spouse again (or yourself, if you’re the one who cheated).

Sometimes marriage counseling is very painful while you’re going, but once the painful things come out it’s like a wound that’s been cleaned out –now it can start to heal.

The secret techniques aren’t really secret either, but they might as well be because few people every try them and instead do the exact opposite.

The first thing you can do when you find yourself asking, “How to save my marriage?” is to simply leave your spouse alone. Enjoy some me time without your partner. It doesn’t have to be for very long. It can be just a few days. Just make sure your partner knows that it isn’t practice for splitting up, you’re just giving him or her a little breathing room.

Sometimes marriages suffer because spouses spend too much time together. If that’s the case in your marriage, some time apart can be a very good thing.

If the problem with the marriage is that you spend too much time apart already, then you can make a difference in your marriage by taking some initiative. Vow right now to make some changes, and go and schedule a weekend getaway for you both. If that’s too expensive, plan an outing for the day. Or plan three hours of dinner and a movie where it’s just the two of you, on a private and surprise date.

You’d be surprised how these two secret techniques, when used at the appropriate times, can feel so good they’ll take you from asking, “How to save my marriage?” to wondering why you hadn’t been doing these things for several years.

Simple Steps to Get My Girlfriend Back

“Can I get my girlfriend back ever?” If that is what you are pondering it seems like you may be in a hard situation. There is a chance but it may be only a sliver. You have to know that it won’t result in your or hers heart getting ripped apart again. The truth is one of you screwed up. Who was it? Can the person who messed up that caused you to get separated in the first place be trusted again? The answer to that question may not let you know the answer to “Can I get my girlfriend back?” but it will help you know if you should.

Is it the best idea for both of you to get back together? If you are fully convinced that it is then you might be able to. The problem is in persuading the ex girlfriend that you should. You need to write down all the reasons that support the idea to get back together. It doesn’t need to be a letter or anything. It can be just a list of all the reasons why it would be a good thing to get your girlfriend back. You can even put at the top of it, “Can I get my girlfriend back or should I even try?”

When write this you are going to jot down every reason that it would be good to get back together. Try brain storming if you have trouble coming up with good ideas. Write down everything that you can think of whether it’s silly or not. Sometimes the small things make all the difference in the world. After you have your list, go through and jot down an objection to each one. Don’t be afraid to do this, it’s called being objective. The answer to “Can I get my girlfriend back?” may be yes if you are able to find all objections and overcome them.

Look at this all closely and try to convince yourself that it isn’t the best idea. If you can’t do that then it’s a matter of letting your ex girlfriend know the reasons why you should. What you have done with all of this is made yourself able to deal with any objections and concerns that she has of why it wouldn’t be a good thing. You may have very well found out the answer to “Can I get my girlfriend back?” by answering all the questions surrounding that one.

There is one objection that you might not be able to overcome and that is, "I just need her." If she just does not want to get back together, there might be no other reason for it. You can’t make her want you. You can’t convince her that she should. This is one of the things that you have to be prepared for. What you will be doing, though, is getting to that answer. If she does have a part of her that wants to be with you then the answer to “Can I get my girlfriend back?” is ‘yes’.

Desire Your Ex Back?

Too many people confuse desire with a negative emotion. Desire: is nothing more than a strong want and if that strong want or desire keeps you on task, than isn't it a positive thing? Now if you confuse desire with lust that is a different emotion all together, now isn't it.

There is nothing wrong with desire. As a matter of fact I think too many times people push their desires down with the thought that they will never attain their desires so why keep trying. It sounds harsh or sad, but true. What kind of life will you lead if you ignore your desires?

You may be asking, what does this have to do with getting my ex back? Well, it has a lot to do with getting your ex back. If your desire to rekindle a love affair with someone and never do anything about it, then you fit right in with 90% of the public that go through life unfulfilled.

Take the idea in your conscious mind and give it to your unconscious mind where it will develop into a desire or a strong want. Focus on your desires and make them come true. With patients and planning you can make all of your desires come true.

Thank you for listening to my "off the beaten path" subject today.

May all your wants and desires come true!

Lost Love-How to deal with a Lost Relationship

I find myself from time to time deep in thought about previous relationships and how eventually I lost love. I try to learn from the experiences where I lost love so that I can do better next time. One of my biggest focuses is always to move on with a much greater understanding of the concept of love than what I had before.

There are parts of my life where I was absolutely sure that I lost love in a way that was worse than ever before. I always felt as if my life was over at this point and perhaps that I would never find love again. However, as it turns out, each and every time that I lost love, it was only so that I could move on and find a better and stronger love in the future.

We all have to remember that love has a spontaneous lifespan just like everything else that we experience in our lives. Every time that I lost love, I realized this, and it helped me move on and make sense of what I was feeling in a capacity that allowed me to find happiness again even after losing love.

Each time that I lost love, I found myself realizing that the lifespan of the most recent relationship was longer than the lifespan of the last relationship, meaning that each relationship brought more meaning and more joy than before. I was definitely benefiting, growing as a person, even though it did not always seem so at the time.

Typically any time that I lost love, I felt as if I was never going to get it back. I felt as if I was lost forever and would never feel joy or love or happiness again. But upon thinking about the relationship and the moment where I lost love, I eventually realized that even though the end of the relationship was bad or rocky, I still walked away with good things, learning and growing as a person in the process.

I soon realized that just because I lost love, that did not mean that I would not find it again.

I realized that just because I had lost love, it did not mean that I was destined to be alone forever.

Most importantly, I learned that in losing love, I was learning how to find love again.

As we get older and become more experienced in matters of the heart, our relationship life spans grow, and our loves increase and become more powerful and more influential over our lives. That means losing love is a part of gaining love and growing love.

If you are in a position where you have lost love, don't let your willpower to carry on falter. You will either rekindle that love if it is meant to be, or you will find new and better love in the future, having learned from each and every one of your past relationships, even the bad ones.

This is just a small snippet of the wisdom T.W Jackson shares in his book "The Magic of Making Up" You can read my full review of his book and how it changed my life, over at www.ExBackLove.com.

Song of heartbreak Can Get Your Ex Back

Songs of heartbreak are the perfect songs to listen to after a breakup.. You don't feel like listening to anything happy and upbeat. In fact, some happy songs can only make things worse because you're reminded of the good times you had together. You may even write a few songs of heartbreak yourself. (it is great therapy)

Songs of heartbreak can be traced as far back as mans discovery of music and heart ache. If you're not comfortable trying to come up with an entire song or you have trouble rhyming, you can always write a poem instead. (take a look at yesterdays post)

You can even write your ex a long letter in which you express yourself, if you feel a poem or song is just too hard or too far removed from that they would actually expect of you. But if you can make up a song that truly expresses how you feel then you should go for it.

If you've ever had someone write a poem or a song for you, you know how great it feels. So the idea that you would make up heartbroken songs might really move your ex to think about what's going on. They're sure to be touched in some say by the gesture, at least. It is the thought that counts and everyone would love a song written for them.

To write these songs, you only need to write poetry and then put it to music. You have to write the words, but you don't have to be able to write music. Just come up with a melody and sing the songs to that melody. If you can't come up with a melody of your own, then pick a melody from a favorite song and write new words for it.

Still, writing songs isn't for everyone. Fortunately there have been millions of them written for you already! You probably already have a few favorites that you like to listen to. Now they might have an entirely new meaning when you listen to them.

There's a good chance that your ex will find new meaning in them too, since you've broken up. You could burn a CD of several sad songs about break ups and send it to him or her with a letter. The thing that makes this so effective is that you'll very carefully choose the songs you include.

Just because a song is sad and about a breakup doesn't mean it's a good idea to include it. Really listen to the words and the sentiment behind them. Then choose songs that especially fit your situation.

I can really be effective to choose a few sad songs about the relationship being strained or ending, and include a really uplifting love song among them. If you have a special song as a couple, including that as the last song on the CD can remind your ex of happier times.

Heartbroken songs are there to help you heal, but if you use them correctly they may help you get back together with your ex. Don't be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings with your ex. At the very least you can say, "Hey, I tried." And you won't have to go though life thinking, "What if." Or, "If I would have only done this, we would still be together."

Writting a Poem to Bring Your Relationship Back

Being separated from your loved one can get you in tune with your true felling for someone, it can even bring you back together. Writing poetry is a good way to express how you feel about a break up. And if you write a really touching heartbroken poem, you might impress your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend with how much you really care.

You don't have to be a poet to write a poem that will make a great impression on your ex. Sharing your feelings and what your relationship meant to you will be all that you need. Writing a poem from the heart will force your ex to see you in a different light.

You probably shouldn't write the poem the moment you break up and within an hour rush it over to them to read. A heartbroken poem, to be genuine, is something that will probably take at least a little time to write.

You aren’t going to want to just jot down anything that comes to your mind and start reading it out loud to your ex. Something like that will feel false and forced. You want this to be genuine if it's going to help you get back together.

It's not that hard to write a heartbroken poem once you decide to do it and you get started. The hardest part is getting started, though, so you have to make yourself do that. Then it will probably start to flow more naturally.

First, just think about how you feel. Of course you'll feel things like sadness or hurt. But if you can compare that to something else rather than just say you're sad or hurt, it makes a more powerful poem. Likening a flooding rain to all the tears you've cried is better than just saying "I've cried a lot."

Comparing tears to rain is a little cliché, but it gives you the general idea of how you should use metaphors to make the writing better and more meaningful. In the poem, tell your ex what's different about your life without them, and how you'd like to have them back. You can list the reasons, as long as they're valid ones that your ex might want to hear.

If you've not written much or any poetry, then don't worry about rhyming. Modern poetry rarely rhymes unless it's for comic effect. Just write kind of like you speak, but with metaphor and words that bring up a mental picture as you read.

You can also be very honest in the poem in a way that might make you uncomfortable in a conversation. Especially if you won't be there when your ex reads the poem, it's easier to say things you might worry about saying in person, because there can't be an immediate rejection. So say what you want to say.

It might not be easy to write something like that to give to your ex. You might worry that they'll think it's silly. But you'll always know that you tried. Even if your heartbroken poem doesn’t change anything, at least you fought for what you wanted. And you will be surprised at how good you will feel after get all of your thoughts down on paper.

To find out more on how to write a letter to your ex check out "The Apology Letter" over at ExBackLove.com

10 Steps To Ex Get Back Together

Do you miss your ex? Getting back together is possible. You just have to know how to do it.

Every girl wants a guy who can understand and connect with her. There are rules for pursuing a girl after a break up. I’ll try to explain them in this article about how to deal with your ex. Get back together with her using these 10 steps.

1.) Don’t be afraid to call her. While calling ten times a day says you’re desperate, phoning once or twice a week keeps you on her radar. Be nice and don't argue.

2.) Similarly, send her an email from time to time. Just saying “what’s up?” gives her the opportunity to reconnect. Again, avoid being defensive or starting an argument.

3.) Don’t date other girls. As long as you’re pining for her, be true to her. If you do occasionally see another girl, don’t sleep with her if you ever want to get back together with your ex. Get back together without creating a new “history” with other women.

4.) Don’t forget her birthday. A birthday is a great “excuse” to get back in touch. Everyone likes to be remembered, celebrated, and even gifted on their birthday. So, treat her like a princess on this day.

5.) Analyze her. Figure out what she needs in a man. Be aware of what she says and does when she talks. You need to understand your ex now more than ever before. Listening is the key here, truly listen.

6.) Don’t be jealous. After you’ve broken up, you don’t have any claim on her. So, don’t exhibit jealousy if she goes out with another guy. Remember she is your ex. Get back together means that you have to understand this basic principle.

7.) Be on the lookout as to how she acts with other guys. If she stands up for you when other guys put you down, it’s a good sign she’s still interested in you. But, if she takes out the butcher knife and stabs you in the back, then there’s not much hope of getting back into a healthy, happy relationship.

8.) Don’t play games. When you’re broken up with someone you love, it’s easy to start the “mind games.” But, you can damage her for life with this kind of behavior. You don’t want to hurt her if you want to get back together. So, just don’t play mind games.

9.) Power is important. Hold your cards close to your chest. Relationships are difficult. When you are together, you can communicate, but apart, you need to keep your feelings close to your vest. When you say “I love you” to a girl you’ve broken up with, you’ve given away all of your power and she has you in a precarious position.

10.) Be desirable. During the break up, stay in shape or get back into shape. Expand your interests. In short, be the boyfriend she wants. You already have a history. If you are even more alluring this time around, she’s sure to want you back.

It is possible to reconcile with your ex. Get back together using the advice in this article.

For a complete guide to winning your ex back for good pick up a copy of "The Magic of Making Up" by T.W. Jackson but before you do read my review at www.exbacklove.com